Friday, April 30, 2010


Directly from the file of "EEWWWW!!", we have this headline from Yahoo! Lifestyle: "I'm in love with my grandson and we're having a baby." Have I already said EEWWWW? I did? Well, something like this warrants it again. EEWWWW!!

What the what?! Correct. What we have here is extreme oddness portraying itself as fine and dandy. Granted, there are only TWO people that are in the fine and dandy camp, as the rest of us are pretty much going with EEWWWW!! Those two folks would be a one 72-year old Pearl Carter (that's right; could she have a more old person's name than Pearl Carter?) and a one 26-year old grandson by the name of Phil Bailey. He's not just any grandson. He's Pearl's grandson. Good Lord.

Here's the scoop: Apparently, when Pearl was 18, she became pregnant (presumably through the normal means and nothing incestuous) and her parents insisted that she give the baby away as to "not to bring the family into disrepute." (Yeah, I don't think her family would be all that thrilled with her current relationship if they were all worried about the disrepute and all. Sleeping with your grandson is a surefire ticket straight to disrepute. And probably to hell, also.)

She gives her baby daughter away and never sees it again. In 1983, that baby is all grown up and gives birth to Phil. When Phil is 18, his mom tells him that she was adopted. She also told him that she had brain cancer. (That must have been quite a day for ol' Phil there.) He took care of her for six months before she succumbed to her cancer. That's when he decided it would be a good idea to track down his grandmother. It took him three years, but he finally did it. And considering that I know how this story turned out, I'm kind of wishing that it took him a little bit longer, you know?

So, Phil found an address for Pearl and he wrote to her. That's quaint. A letter. I wonder if he used a quill and an ink well to make her feel more comfortable? Regardless, Pearl said that she "... was stunned to get his letter...My heart jumped that I'd be re-united with a grandson. I wrote back immediately and included my phone number." To her rotary phone, I presume?

Phil called Pearl. As Pearl describes the conversation, "We both cried but kept talking for three hours." Huh. Really? OK. After that the relationship progressed and according to Pearl, "When he emailed me a photo, I thought what a handsome and sexy man he was before pinching myself – he was my grandson!" EEWWWW!! Look, I'm OK with the seeing a photo of the guy and thinking how handsome he was. That's normal. Thinking he's sexy? When you know he's your grandson? Not so normal. I'm guessing that Pearl didn't send him an image of herself because it was really short notice to find someone to do an oil painting of her.

"Confused, Pearl talked to a friend, who told her about an article she'd read on Genetic Sexual Attraction (GSA), which occurs when close relatives meet as adults and are attracted to each other." Wow. I'll give her props for telling anyone at all (though I would be interested to know if that friend has ever talked to her since), but it seems to be at this juncture that things begin to go horribly awry when Pearl concluded "I could now understand my feelings and realise they weren't wrong."

I'm going to have to disagree with that conclusion. Just because something has a name, that doesn't mean it isn't wrong! Just because you pour syrup on something, that doesn't make it a pancake!

Pearl recalls that "From the first moment that I saw him, I knew we would never have a grandmother-grandson relationship. For the first time in years I felt sexually alive." Excuse me for a minute. I think I have something in my throat. I believe it's my lunch. EEWWWW!!

They spent their first week getting to know each other by shopping, bowling and eating out. It was the second week when things got a little too close for my comfort (and it should have been for theirs as well!). That's when Pearl kissed Phil and Phil kissed her back. That's also when Pearl "...explained to Phil what she'd discovered about GSA." Upon hearing about GSA, Phil stated that he "...was thrilled and excited" because "I could be with Pearl and it was OK because she'd never raised me or been in my life." Oh! UN-fortunate! Something got lost in the translation there! Because it's clearly NOT OK! It's not a matter of whether or not she has ever been in your life! She's RELATED to you! It's OK for her to be in your life. It's NOT OK for her to be in your pants! I'm certainly glad that his mother wasn't around for him to explain to her that he's doing HER mother! That's beyond how wrong even this whole ordeal is.

(WARNING: This next part is not for children. It's barely for adults.) The night that they kissed is when "...grandmother and grandson became lovers." Oh, God. "Making love to Pearl was a real eye-opener." Oh, I don't doubt that for minute! Even though if it were me and I would most definitely want my eyes closed, I'm sure that having sex with your Grandma IS an eye-opener. No kidding. He said, "It was love combined with all this sexual tension that had been building up." Sexual tension or not, it doesn't mean you should be doin' Granny! Ever!

Now, you know that this story cannot possibly end there, right? No, what would make this freak show absolutely complete would be if they hired a surrogate to carry a baby for them. Yep, that should do it. Meet Roxanne Campbell!

Yep, that's a picture of what you think it is. They met Roxanne after they decided to use "Pearl's retirement money to find a surrogate mother and buy a donor egg to inseminate with Phil's sperm." They placed an ad and though it doesn't say where, I'm guessing craigslist? Where else would you find someone to go along with this sort of oddity?! Upon finding out of the incestuous nature of the whole thing, Roxanne says that she was "shocked". But never let a little shock hold anyone back from helping an incestuous couple reproduce! Especially if you're like Roxanne and you see that "...they're a brilliant pair and I saw how much they loved each other. I know the baby will be loved too." Sure. It'll be loved. From the retirement home, I have the feeling.

And Pearl's take on how things ended up? "I am finally going to be a mum and not forced to give up my child. Phil's going to be a great dad. I never in a million years thought at 72 I'd be "pregnant" and in love with my grandson. I make no apologies and I believe God's given me a second chance." Oh, really?! You NEVER thought you'd be in love with your grandson? I'm shocked! That never entered your mind? Go figure! And by the way, you probably should apologize. I don't know to who, but it just seems as if there's an apology that's necessary here somewhere. (I feel a little violated. I'd take an apology.) Also, while I do believe that God gives second chances, I don't think He does so in this way, exactly. Yeah, I think He does it differently. I PRAY He does it differently. Just because your cat has kittens in the oven, that doesn't make them biscuits. Or something like that.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Digital Scrapping Of Zoo Photos

Here are the digital scrapbook pages I've done of our zoo trip.

Gorillas scrapbook layout

Monkeys scrapbook layout

Zoo scrapbook layout

Pooped Out On Pickles

Milkshake scrapbook layout, "All I Need Is Love... But A Little Chocolate Never Hurt!"

Zoo scrapbook layout (all digital scrapbooking)

Brett in constant motion with Granddaddy Pickles and Grandmother Grommie right behind him! Constant motion digital scrapbook layout!

Silver and Gold, Pickles and his grandson Brett

Out to eat scrapbooking layout. We ate at Lizard's Thicket and here is my digital scrapbooking layout.

Leave Arizona Alone!

I'm so confused by the reaction to this immigration status law that passed in Arizona that I really don't know what to think anymore. I have been completely surprised at the majority of the reactions that I've been hearing. I've even had at least one really close friend join some dumbass anti-racism group on freaking Facebook protesting this law. And this is a person who is extremely educated and extremely sane. I'm completely blown away. Let's review a couple of things, shall we?

If you're in this country illegally, you're breaking the law. Period. There's no way around this fact. To say that "most" of the illegals are law-abiding individuals is completely false. They're breaking the law by being here illegally. That's not law-abiding.

New American, we learn that Phoenix has averaged a kidnapping a day in recent years, the AP reports, with some resulting in torture and death. A kidnapping per day? Really? Yep. Many of these kidnappings are fueled by the illegal drug trade which has wandered its way across the border and into Phoenix. And that makes Phoenix the kidnapping capital of the United States. U-S-A! U-S-A!!

Now, if you just listen to East Cost media, you'll think that there is no one in the country, sans Arizona Governor Jan Brewer, who is in favor of this new law. Not quite. A
Rasmussen Reports telephone survey showed that "...70% of likely voters in Arizona approve of the legislation, while just 23% oppose it." Seventy percent of the people IN the state where the law is are just fine and dandy with it. (I'd really like to know what is up with the other 7% that weren't represented by a yes or a no answer. Who can't answer yes or no to a simple question like that?) Why is that figure not reported more often? Because that wouldn't fit the narrative of what the media wants you to believe.

Granted, that's just the voters in Arizona. What about the rest of the country? Well, again, according to a
Rasmussen Reports telephone survey, when people were asked "Do you favor or oppose legislation that authorizes local police to stop and verify the immigration status of anyone they suspect of being an illegal immigrant?" 60% of them said that they were in FAVOR of it. Only 31% said that they opposed it and the rest said that they weren't sure. Even with the sampling error of +/- 3%, that's still a majority of 57% in favor of it at the very least. And that's nationwide.

The next person who is within an arm's length of me that says "We're a nation of immigrants" is going to get punched. I'm going to point out again that when this great nation was being built, it's not like just anyone was allowed to come in. At the whole Ellis Island checkpoint thing, they checked to make sure you had either money, a job, or relatives over here. THEN they asked you a series of 29 questions. I'm pretty sure that there was some sort of health screening involved. The point here is that they did not let people just wander on over simply because they wanted to!

Next in line of people that I'd like to punch would be anyone suggesting any sort of a boycott of anything having to do with Arizona. I've mentioned this before, but because of the number of softheads that have crawled out of the woodwork (as they so often do when needed legislation is passed) I'm going to mention it again. Boycotts rarely work. I can cite the Montgomery bus boycott as an effective boycott that took place in this country. I am hard pressed to come up with another one, probably because there aren't any. Getting a boycott to actually accomplish something is extremely difficult. The main problem is having enough people all on the same page. Do you think that you can get anyone in the year 2010 to be on the same page as someone else? Highly unlikely. While you're explaining which page to go to, they're updating their Facebook. It's a lost cause.

But here's the most ridiculous idea for a boycott against Arizona that I have heard so far. According to the huffy folks over at the
Huffington Post, "An initiative apparently started on the Internet asks people to boycott the AriZona Beverage Co. because of claims the law will unfairly target Hispanics." Wait. What now?

They want people to stop buying AriZona Iced Tea products? Look, the stuff isn't that great to begin with, but that's not the point. The point is that it's only A NAME! You nimrods! AriZona Beverage Co. is based in Woodbury, 20 miles east of New York City! According to the article "Chairman Don Vultaggio says it was started by "two hardworking guys from Brooklyn" in 1992 and has always been in New York." Good Lord....

This is how some people are choosing to make a statement? By not buying cold beverages from a company that has nothing to do with the law OR the state? Are you the type of people who tell people not to ever buy sheets from bedding manufacturers because you're against the Ku Klux Klan? (They still use the sheets, right? That's still a Klan staple? I'm really not sure. I've never been real up on my Klan references. And these days, when you're looking to make a racist analogy, everyone automatically reaches for Hitler, so I'm a little fuzzy on the Klan. But I'm sure you understand my point.) Are you people going to boycott the NFL's Arizona Cardinals? What about the Arizona Diamondbacks? Are the Phoenix Suns out as well? Seriously, what is wrong with you?

This law wasn't something that was just thought up and passed overnight. No, it was passed because there was a need for it. It was a need that the Federal government refused to address. Governor Brewer had written at least FIVE letters over the past two years (so those of you that want to blame Bush for everything, make sure that you realize that President Barry ignored her letters, too) to the White House explaining that they needed some help to combat the illegal immigration problem that was occurring in Arizona. She never received a reply. Not ONE. Just completely ignored. If the Federal government wasn't going to do the job that it is supposed to do, then Arizona was going to take care of itself. And I'm glad that it did. Come on, California. Stop being such a wuss and do the same thing.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Ark! What Goes There?

Over there across the pond at the Daily Mail we learn that a bunch of explorers who "...say they found seven large wooden compartments beneath snow and volcanic debris near the peak of Mount Ararat". Yeah, that's right. They think that they've found Noah's Ark.

Now, the whole Noah's Ark thing is an interesting story. And depending on what your views on the Bible are (meaning, you believe it), the prospect of finding Noah's Ark would be very exciting and have great meaning. That's why you can't really be too careful when it comes to believing any claims of finding said ark. After all one of the guys making this claim is a documentary filmmaker from Hong Kong. Finding Noah's Ark would make for a pretty good movie. Claiming that you've found Noah's Ark would make for an equally pretty good movie. I think it's all going to be in how he sells it.

Right now, the filmmaker, a one Yeung Wing-cheung (everybody Wing-cheung tonight) has started selling his "find" by telling the Daily Mail "It's not 100 per cent that it is Noah's Ark, but we think it is 99.9 per cent that this is it." Yeah, see, thinking that it's 99.9 percent Noah's Ark doesn't really make it 99.9 percent really Noah's Ark. If they had something to back that 99.9 percent thought up with, I might consider it. But they kind of don't.

Here's what they claim to have: They claim that "...wood taken from the site, which is more than 13,000ft above sea level, dates to 2,800BC." It's a little unclear (ie, they don't say) where and how this testing was done. I don't know if they just gave some of the wood the ol' eyeball test or what, but it would be good to know. There are pictures, though! Oh, but they're not of the exterior of the structure or anything like that. But they're Yes. I believe that they are going for convincing. Let's see, shall we? Behold!

What is that? Well, clearly, from the cards, you can tell that from the top and going left to right, a Noah's Ark Crystal, Noah's Ark White Pellets, Noah's Ark Rope and a Noah's Ark Wood Specimen. Was there a Science Fair? What's with the display? It is unclear what is in between the rope and the wood specimen. Further un-clarity would include the question as to what makes a "wood specimen" any different from "a piece of wood". And while I am familiar with the story of Noah's Ark, I don't recall the tale including any crystals. Perhaps that was in the JRR Tolkien version, but not in the regular Biblical version that most folks conjure up in their brains. Yeah, that tale is usually crystal-less. Also, I don't know what to make of the "white pellets". Yes, we see that. But what is the significance? We don't know. But, yay! Pellets?! Something? (Hey, I'm trying!)

Here is a piece of wood up close. I don't know if it's Noah's Ark wood, but I am confident in saying that it is wood.

Yep. That's wood. Definitely wood. I think. Moving is a photo that " said to show part of a wall inside the structure found by the explorers."

Hmm. I don't know what that pack-like looking thing is there in the middle, but it does look well preserved. And I don't know about the hay or straw or whatever that is. Would hay or straw still be around some 4,800 years after the fact? I mean, I know it's really cold in this area of Turkey where they claim to have found this, but hay or straw doesn't exactly strike me as the most hardy of all substances to survive that long, you know?

Here's a picture of Wing-cheung standing in front of a lot of rocks with what looks to be some stairs underneath.

Those are stairs. And that is a guy. But whether that's a guy standing in front of stairs on Noah's Ark is yet to be determined. Apparently, this group of 15 fundamentalist Christians exploring the Turkish mountain started looking in this direction after 2006 when a one "U.S. national security analyst Porcher Taylor claimed this satellite image revealed a a baffling 'anomaly' on the mountain's north-west corner that he believed to be the remains of the Ark." Behold!

OK, look, there may be a baffling anomaly there. There might not be a baffling anomaly. It's really hard to tell. The red oval is very distinct. I will admit to recognizing that. As far as anything else goes? I couldn't tell you if there's an anomaly or not. But I will buy into the baffling part, as I have no clue as to what I'm looking at.

Would it be cool if this really was Noah's Ark. Hell, yes, it would be cool. But am I holding my breath? Not hardly. I'm going to need a little bit more than what we've been given. Some external photos would be appreciated. And an explanation as to what the white pellets are. Both of those would help. I'll be waiting.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Decorating With Ribbons and Trophies

Horse Show Ribbons

Everyone has received a show ribbon or show trophy at one time or another. Ribbons for horse shows, dog shows, cat shows, fair ribbons, the First Place ribbon from your art project in the 6th grade, baseball tropies, 4H ribbons, a trophy for memorizing scripture or a certificate for no absences in Sunday School in 1992. There are the big trophies like the huge silver trophies for winning a tractor pull or the big crystal bowl for winning the golf tournament. All these mean something to you and your family but what do you do with them!

If you are a professional golfer or football player, you may have a whole room just for your trophies and that's cool. Maybe you have enough for a dedicated show cabinet.

But for the rest of us... how do we display our trophies? If they are flat like ribbons or certificates you can scrapbook them or frame them. If you have a lot, you can get someone to take a photo of you with your trophies and scrapbook them or frame the photo. Children win all kinds of little trophies these days. Some are for nothing more than showing up. This may be good for their self esteem, but do we keep every ribbon, trophy, certificate they ever got? Maybe photos are the way to go in this case. Keep the trophies and display them on the fridge or in their room for a certain length of time, but then take photos and get rid of the little nothing prizes. It becomes too much clutter.

But, there are ways to display the more important things. A once-in-a-lifetime horse show ribbon? How about framing it?

I remember when my sisters were in horse shows and they got so many ribbons. They usually displayed them in their tack room by hanging them around the room like these people did.

I did a Google search on ribbons and trophies and found some unique ways people have saved their trophies and ribbons. And it seems vintage and antique show ribbons and trophies are in demand. Keep in mind these are quality ribbons and trophies, NOT the junk stuff passed out at the neighborhood softball banquet. Real satin and silk show ribbons, sterling or silver plate trophy cups, real crystal cups or bowls... these are great for home decorating. Hey, I never got a sterling silver tennis trophy but I love the art deco look of the trophy cups and they can be used whether they have my name on them or not.

Here are the show ribbon quilts and pillows I found. How cool are they!?!

I found a few photos that show trophy cups in home decor.

I noticed that some keep their silver trophies polished and some like the tarnished look. I may suggest a tip with silver... if you like your silver polished, then polish it when it starts turning yellow. It's a lot less difficult to polish it back to a shine. If you wait until it's black with tarnish it's more difficult to shine back up. And polishing is actually removing a layer of silver which eventually takes you back to the original metal of silverplate and will eventually, over a long period of time, make your sterling thin. For more on this check out my post on silver at

I had some ideas of my own but didn't find a photograph for it. How about a glass box or glass box table filled with those show ribbons?

* Using the show ribbons as tie backs for curtains?

* Using a display side table or display coffee table filled with show ribbons and small trophies?

* Use trophy cups for candles.

* Fill trophy cups with natural items like pine cones, shells, sand, twigs, apples, etc. Group 3 and vary heights to make a trophy vignette.

* Trophy plates and trophy trays displayed on the walls

* Trophy plates and trophy trays used as clocks

* Use trophy cups to hold miniature Christmas trees

* Use small trophies and ribbons on Christmas trees

I hope I've given you some ideas!