Household Tips

Razor blade dullness stems more from oxidation and microscopic rusting, rather than actually shaving whiskers. Water that sits on blades between shaves causes the oxidation. Corrosion can cause metal on the blade to flake off and the edge to become blunted and jagged. By blotting your razor on a towel after use, you can extend the use of a blade. Or you can also rinse the razor, shake off excess water, dip it in alcohol, give it a good swirl, shake out and prop it in its holder.

Use jars for storage. You don't have to buy them. As you use items that come in glass jars, then recycle them by removing the labels and washing. You can use them to hold leftovers such as soup, beans, etc. They can hold office supplies. Baby food jars are great for holding paper clips, tacks, etc. Use one in the laundry or bedroom to hold your loose change. They will hold nails and screws. You can attach them to a shelf by screwing the lid to the bottom of a shelf. Then you screw the jar onto the lid so that it hangs from the bottom of a shelf. I use jars in my pantry for storing dry goods like beans, rice, popcorn.

Paper towel holders can also be used to hold spools of ribbon.

Go Directly To Hell

Today's senseless baby death comes from (of course) Flori-duh and involves a *rolls dice* woman who was *rolls dice* angry that her baby was crying while *rolls dice* she was playing Farmville on Facebook and so she *rolls dice* shook him to death. Dislike.

It's just as sick and disgusting as it sounds. According to the New York Daily News, a one 22-year old (and old enough to know better) Alexandra V. Tobias has has pleaded guilty to second-degree murder in the shaking death of her 3-month old son, Dylan Lee Edmondson. See, she was playing freaking Farmville on Facebook and eventually "...confessed to losing her temper while trying to concentrate on the game." Trying to concentrate on the game? It's freaking FARMVILLE. But regardless of how much concentration it did or did not require, shouldn't you have been paying more attention to your baby in the first place? Yeah, I think you are. Moron.

Just so it's clear what a piece of shoe scum this woman is, "...she confessed to shaking the baby, smoking a cigarette to calm down and then shaking the baby again." Sooo, apparently that cigarette didn't do a whole lot of calming down, eh? Wow, lady. You really are a nutjob. But, really, have I been clear enough on what a horrible and useless individual this woman is? Not quite? Well, when the baby was taken to the hospital, he was found to have "...head injuries and a broken leg". And "Doctors said the infant died from "abusive head trauma." What in the hell is wrong with you?

You shook the kid so hard that you broke his freaking leg?! He was three months old, you bitch. And all because you had to "concentrate" on your G-D farm that isn't even real! There's a special place in hell for people like her and the sooner she gets to it, the better as far as I'm concerned.

Oh, and by the way, she looks just about like you'd expect her to. Behold!

By the way, cupcake...there isn't Farmville in prison. Enjoy!

R.I.P Paul

There's been a celebrity death. If you haven't heard, brace yourself. Are you braced? ARE YOU?? Good. Here we go. The beloved cephalopod mollusc, a one Paul the Octopus, has died. Wait. What?

Paul the Octopus. He's dead. Dead I said. (I'm feeling a bit of a Dr. Seuss eulogy coming on here. I must refrain.) You remember Paul, don't you? He was the octopus in Oberhausen, Germany, who lived at the Sea Life Center. Paul was able to correctly "predict" the winner of all of the matches that Germany played at the 2010 World Cup, including the final. Here's how it worked: One of the Sea Life Center folks would put an octopus treat (I'm guessing something similar to a Scooby Snack) in two clear plastic boxes. One box had the flag of Germany on it and the other box had the flag of Germany's opponent on it. Whichever box that Paul opened first to get his little Octopus Ort (it just doesn't have the same ring to it as Scooby Snack does), that was supposed to be the winner. And, surprisingly enough, in this case, it was the winner...seven times in a row.

But now he's dead at the ripe old octopus age of 2-1/2. Apparently, that is normal for an octopus. And while that may be interesting to you and me, I highly doubt that ol' Paul is finding the fascination in it right about now. But the way that this is being treated in the press, you'd think that one of the leaders of the free world had just croaked it. It seems to be getting an awful lot of ink (pun probably intended) for an octopus. But not everyone is in mourning (or craving calamari) right now. No, according to The Hindu (the publication, not a random guy), a one Diego Maradona, the former coach of the Argentina team, is not in mourning. The chap seems to be rather happy, as indicated in a freaking tweet that read, "I am happy your gone Psychic Octopus, it’s your fault we lost the World Cup." I see. After someone explains to Mr. Maradona that there is no such thing as a "psychic octopus", could someone then explain to him that "you're" is the correct form of "you are" that he was looking for there? Thank you.

And see, I would have found it amusing that someone was so into the whole dead octopus scene if it were not for this blurb at the end of the article: "Paul died early Tuesday of natural causes. His passing was mourned by the world football community and the aquarium in Oberhausen announced it would set up a small monument in his honour." Oh, for cryin' out loud.

A small monument? For a lucky octopus? Really? What kind of a small monument are we talking about here? A large bowl of cocktail sauce, perhaps? I don't get it. And as long as I'm on the subject of things I don't get, what was I supposed to infer from learning that he died of "natural causes"? As opposed to what? Being snuffed out by his lesser known cousin, The Unlucky Squid? Well, that would depend on who you're asking. Wait. What now?

If you ask a Chinese filmmaker named Jiang Xiao (pronounce that however you'd like) she'll tell you “I am 60 to 70 per cent sure that Paul died on July 9th (two days before the World Cup final) and the Germans have been covering up his death and fooling us for a long time.” Really? 60 to 70 percent sure? A little over half sure? Well, OK, then! Seriously? Really? That's like a C-minus at best. I'm not so sure that I'd call that grounds for "a cover up". I might call it grounds to get some inane publicity for your forthcoming film about nothing, though.

Really. According to something called The Spec, "Shortly...after picking Spain over his native Germany in the semis, he received anonymous death threats." Someone threatened an octopus? How would the octopus know? Could this octopus also read? Did it correspond with fans? What the hell is going on over there in German aquariums?! That seems to be the real issue at this point!

The unpronounceable conspiracy theorist filmmaker (there's a title for a business card for you) claims that the "Paul" that was in the tank making all of the predictions was really another octopus that had been switched out. What evidence does this nutjob have for this theory? "(Octopuses) all look the same. It is impossible to tell the difference.” You know what else looks the same? Crazy. Crazy looks the same no matter who it is who's boasting all of the crazy. The octopus is dead. Get over it.

And P.S. If he had picked all six winning Powerball numbers one week, then you would have had my attention. Actually, if it had been something other than soccer you would have had my attention. Couldn't he have been put to use for a more exciting sport?

Organizing Tips

I think this is a good idea for your children's artwork and special schoolwork. Each child has a binder for each year. You can use pockets and page protectors and just slip those special things in. If the art is too big for a binder, then consider taking a photo of it and putting the photo in the notebook.

Storing China, Crystal and Silver

I love dishes! I have sets of china for all the seasons in a year: Winter, Christmas, Spring, Summer, Fall and then some. I have crystal and silver too. I have 4 large china cabinets and a buffet in my dining room and they are all full. So I have plenty of display for my collection. But if you need to store china (vs. display) then you want to store it carefully.

If you stack china then put something between each piece so nothing gets scratched. I use coffee filters. You could also use paper plates, paper doilies, etc.

You can use special china storage containers like these that I found at Organize.com.



















For silver you can store them in these silver cloth bags.




For more information about silver, silver storage and cleaning check out my post on Stainless and Silver Flatware.

Call Me Senator

I've become less and less enamored with Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA). Actually, I don't think I was ever all that enamored with her in the first place. Can you be enamored with a potted plant? I don't think that you can. And that's about what I think of Barbara Boxer. My final straw with her was summer of 2009. She was in some sort of hearing where an Army general was testifying. As per how the military is trained, he addressed her as "Ma'am." She didn't like that very much and interrupted him in order to tell him that she preferred being addressed as "Senator" because, as she put it, she "worked so hard to get that title".

That's what she was worried about. Being called "Senator" as opposed to being called "ma'am". Mind you, she called him "sir" as opposed to "General". I'm pretty sure that he worked pretty hard to get that title as well. I guess that he just wasn't as petty as she was and didn't feel the need to point that out to her at the time. He wasn't being disrespectful. If anything, he was treating her with the utmost respect. But whatever. She treated him like crap for no reason is the bottom line. She's a bit of a blowhard. And I'm apparently not the only one who thinks so.

Enter a one David Zucker. Mr. Zucker is a reformed liberal who was also a main part of the group of folks who made such awesome satirical movies such as "Naked Gun" and "Airplane!" That sort of experience really proves to come in handy when one wants to make a video which mocks Barbara Boxer for her elitist position about her, um, well, her position. And it's hilarious. It's win-win. See the awesomeness for yourself below.

By the way, my dislike for Barbara Boxer should be in no way interpreted as an endorsement for Carly Fiorina. While I think Carly has potential, I just don't know about her in the capacity as Senator. That doesn't mean that I think Barbara Boxer should stay put. I hate having only two viable choices. It only serves to make me feel all the more scroomed.

Household Tips

George Foreman Grills: After removing the cooked food from the grill, place a paper towel soaked in water on each of the 2 cooking surfaces. Unplug the appliance, allow it to sit for 5-30 minutes (while you eat), then use the paper towels to effortlessly wipe out the grease and food particles.